Holding on to the sliver

Reviews galore, but nothing more.

I've been rattling around thoughts in my brain and thinking I need to get things recorded.

You know how a new year brings new hope? New goals? Dreams that may come true this year?

Here we are, 23 days in to the new year and it is not going how I thought.

Hopes feel dashed, dreams feel squashed, goals are out the window. All need to be rewritten. They need to include issues like

breast cancer.

possible colon cancer.

joblessness.

cirrhosis.

blood clots.

anxiety.

depression.

unexplained seizures.

alcoholism.

All of the above are happening in my family. My immediate family. Not cousins. Not aunts. Not extended family. Those I hold close.

Many of the above diagnoses we found out in the past 23 days.

How does one hold these? How does one hold on to hope through all of these? How do I encourage my brothers? My sister-in-laws? My mother-in-law? My parents? My husband? My kids?

This is where I find myself. Needing to re-examine everything.

It can be extremely overwhelming if I let all thoughts run loosey-goosey. If I let emotions overtake all common sense.

I find the sliver of hope in Jesus and I have to cling to Him. He keeps me breathing through every diagnosis. Every doctor appointment. Every time I think, "how can things possibly get worse?" and they end up getting worse.

I continue to cling. It's the only choice.